Gendernomics: The recipe for Oneitis

unicorn-06I haven’t spoken much on investment theories related to the concept of gendernomics. Investment theories are various patterns that have been observed and sometimes quantified when it comes to how humans psychologically act when doing investments, mostly in stocks. The stock market is one of those areas that tend to reward consistent behavior, reason and attention to facts something demonstrated by the value investors such as Warren Buffet who stick with a series of rules in order to reduce the emotional impact of making large investments. There are multiple ways an investment can impact humans emotionally, the first one is losing or gaining money. When your stocks are in the black, you feel elated, you feel more confident, intelligent, and competent. When your stocks are in the red, you feel deflated, stupid and incompetent.   When you are getting ready to “get in” you can be hit with fear, apprehension, anxiety, and when you get out even after taking a huge loss, you may feel more relaxed, and calm.

Many of the same mechanisms are in effect when you are pursuing a woman. Some PUA techniques, such as rapid cold-approaching are built not only to reduce your social anxiety, but also to reduce your approach anxiety, through behavioral conditioning. If you have done something a thousand times, then it will naturally have less of an emotional impact on you have trained yourself to have a tolerance for it.

The beauty of human neuroplasticity and physical reaction is that once you are aware of something, you can train yourself to be less affected by it. This is what is done with cognitive-behavioral therapy. As long as you are aware of the principles at work, you can improve your resistance to them.

The Contrast principle and Halo Effect

The contrast principle/Contrast effect, can be easily demonstrated as follows: Get 3 bowls of water, 1 cold, 1 hot, and 1 lukewarm. Put one of your hands in the cold water, and one in the hot water for 1 minute, then put both of your hands in the lukewarm water. The hand that was in the cold water will feel the lukewarm water as hot, whereas the hand that was in the hot water will feel it as warm. The halo effect is the tendency a person’s overall good or bad feelings about a person to spill over to thoughts about that persons entity or character. For instance, people tend to view attractive people as more intelligent or competent.

The contrast effect causes a miss-calculation of desirability based on a recent perception of availability. If you’re looking at women walking by your house while looking at models, you naturally view the women outside as less attractive. Where this creates the major problem for many men, is when they see a woman who appears more desirable because of contrast, context or the cheerleader effect, follow up by a solid dose of attributing all kinds of good qualities to her via the Halo effect, and then become stuck on her.

Scarcity and the selective perception

The scarcity effect is well documented, and I’ve written about it previously. In brief, this is the tendency of perceived availability to influence our valuations of something and thus our desire for it. The best example I can think of for this is what happens in an auction situation where there are multiple bidders for a unique item, when compared to the actions of the same people if they are quietly online shopping and see plenty of an item in stock. The scarcity effect creates a state of perceived urgency, in that “This object is rare, therefore if I do not get it now, I may never have another chance“. Selective perception is a situation wherein new information is filtered in a manner which confirms the perception of the person while ignoring contradictory information.

He has already convinced himself, through the contrast principle and Halo effect that she is something special. Now, he moves into a space where any action another man takes towards her reinforces her rarity in his mind, and where every action is interpreted through his desired perception.

Consistency and similarity (the like me effect)

The tendency to want to be seen as consistent seems to be common to most humans. It is a trait that make us predictable, that make us appear reliable and congruent to the people we interact with often. It is also a great trait to exploit for manipulation, in situation such as “You just told me how much you care about other people. Would you be willing to donate money for relief aid in Africa?” In this case, the person is being put in a double-bind where they either have to show themselves as inconsistent (a socially undesirable trait) or give money they may be unwilling to part with. The similarity (like me) effect, is the tendency of human beings to like people who we perceive as being similar to us in some fashion. It is part of the explanation why nerdy men tend to be in awe of “gamer girls

Your ability to influence someone is higher if they like you. In this case, the man is already affected by 4 bias, and now he is about to be hit with a double-dose of consistency and similarity. As he is working off the halo effect and subjective perception, he will interpret data in a way that shows how similar and perfect for each other they are. Leading him further down the rabbit-hole, where he is no acting consistent with his actions in the context of being affected by a range of bias, rather than with himself.

The sunk cost and loss aversion

I’ve talked about sunk cost fallacies on this blog before, the core element of a sunk cost fallacy is the tendency to continue investing in what is ultimately an unprofitable project, based on “we have so much invested in this already.” A classic example of this fallacy from the business world, is Eastman-Kodak, who despite having a leg up when it came to bringing digital photography to the marketplace, neglected to do so because they had so much invested in their “rolls of film” business. Loss aversion is when the dis-utility of giving up an object is perceived as greater than the utility of acquiring it.

The result of these two in conjunction is that not only has the man who is over-invested in a female with no guarantee, feeling twice as much anguish over potentially losing her, as the joy he would feel by actually getting her. So, to recap, the man does not have this female, yet he is feeling fear of losing her. If you need an example of the lack of logic at work here, imagine feeling like you lost a car you cannot afford to purchase.

Summary and conclusions

The list of fallacies, biases, shortcuts and other things our minds do as the biological computers they are is painfully long. The principles I outlined above are the ones that show up the most frequently and ones you should become intimately familiar with both using and identifying when they are being used on you.  Normally, I would identify the reasons to suspect that they are being used, but there are too many variants on the same trick to accurately create a “How to” guide. However, as far as first principles go, most of the above play on the 3 major emotions of manipulation namely fear, obligation and guilt. I would think that most are familiar with all three of those feelings. The perception fallacies are much more difficult to adequately get a handle on, and they require significant effort to reduce.

A note:

I recently launched a Patreon page where I will be posting additional content every month for those who support me and I will do a Google Hangout for the highest tier Patrons (limited to 10 people).

I’ve also had some requests for consults, which I’ve declined up until now, but due to demand I’ve chosen to open up for doing some consults on request. For details please check out my Consulting and Patreon Page

As always you can buy my book Gendernomics at as both paperback and Kindle

27 comments on “Gendernomics: The recipe for Oneitis

  1. Timo Fischer says:

    It’s quite fun to read this now because I went through all of this in the exact way you laid it out here.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. “Loss aversion is when the dis-utility of giving up an object is perceived as greater than the utility of acquiring it.”

    Do you mean the cost of change outweighs the perceived benefit of it? I want to make sure I understood this part correctly.


  3. […] An example of the second is how men will often be blinded by bias, errors of logic or lack of experience leading to a severe case of oneitis […]


  4. […] These women utilize a variety of masks that tend to follow the categories outlined in the female sexual strategies, however they are much more intense than a normal woman would be. The normal woman exists as a separate entity from her sexual strategy, whereas this type of woman becomes her sexual strategy. Frequently, such women are gifted actresses and readers of people, thus, will adopt a mask adapted to her target. Her goal here is to attract the male’s attention through appearing as his soulmate. However, do not think that these women only target men deep in the blue pill world of soulmates and happily ever after, red pill men may be just as prone to falling for a unicorn. […]

    Liked by 1 person

  5. […] This is quite common among men who find the sphere because they are hopelessly in love with their unicorn, and seek to deductively solve their problem. They arrive in the sphere, learn game, and […]


  6. […] a solid review of her resume, will often be a good guard against oneitis, and is a precaution against the tendency that most males have to fall very fast and very hard. In […]


  7. saltybull says:

    This and “Musings on cognitive bias and how they related to red pills.” is one of the best explanations on Oneitis in the Manospher. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, it’s appreciated.


  8. […] comes from genuine emotion. In this moment seeking to pivot herself into a position of “The One“. This is not dissimilar to the behavior of more stable examples of womanhood, in that both […]


  9. […] two factors lead to a “Unicorn investment” wherein there is no risk, but unlimited reward. This again leads to a cycle that powered by […]


  10. […] will put her on a pedestal, and then proceed to build up the illusion of her singular status as the most special person in the world. This takes place in both words and action, through allowing her to control the frame, […]


  11. […] there is no flaw with his input, process or output, but with Marketing and Sales. He simply has not found the right market for the amazing product that he is producing. Thus, he should keep producing it and just give it […]


  12. […] to the blue pill fantasy is the idea of there being a “one“, a perfect partner who fulfills your every need. Leaving out the part where perfection is a […]


  13. […] your valuation will improve. The major pitfall in this phase includes paying more attention to her assets rather than her liabilities, something that will destroy any attempt at an accurate valuation. This is quite common in the […]


  14. […] scarce product. The Beta male through “She is not like other girls” justifies his oneitis through a perception of her as extremely scarce, thus justifying his over-valuation of her. Both of […]


  15. […] the men who enter the manosphere looking for a way to secure their blue pill illusion with their oneitis, are successful in securing the relationship, only to then revert back to their old […]


  16. […] the manosphere is the desire to learn game, and adopt the red pill so that they can secure their oneitis and then move back to “just be yourself“. This is reflected in every gym across the […]


  17. […] advice of sleeping with a new person. So far, so good. However, he would then instantly develop oneitis for what was intended as a one night […]


  18. […] Männern, die sich gegenseitig höchstenfalls die Purple Pill zuschustern und selbst Idealismus (Oneitis, Unicorn; Männliche Liebe = Idealistisch, Weibliche Liebe = Opportunistisch) nachrationalisierten. Es ist […]


  19. […] shoes and cargo shorts, however we cannot guarantee that the specific look that your particular one-itis is looking for will automatically land you in bed with […]


  20. daniel hughes says:

    How can I buy your book?


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