Something I’ve picked up on the last few years is that a lot of men use their journey in this space as a buffer, it’s somewhat ironic that despite Rollo’s great article on it from some years ago, it seems many readers aren’t aware that indulging in the content produced by the manosphere can be a buffer in and of itself.
We have live examples every day of men who spend much of their time consuming podcasts, reading blog posts, following twitter, facebook, insta and so on. They are always 1 gumroad course away from being 6 ft, 6 figures, 12 inch dick and 24 inch rims.
Why Are You in the Manosphere?
I think this is an important question to answer, because if you can’t answer it then you’re not going to derive a lot of value from being here. You need to know what the ideal end-state for you looks like, otherwise you cannot make decisions and act on them without running a major risk of ending up where you don’t want to be.
On top of that, a barrier against outside influence is a strong vision that acts as a guide, every time you get an offer to buy a gumroad course, a book, take on an internship or a job, you ask yourself “Is investing time into this conducive to realizing my vision for myself?”
If the answer is no you move on, if the answer is yes, you do a little bit of research then you pull the trigger on the product or action. This space has a lot of resources for improving most aspects of life that men are interested in, money, sex, excitement, strength, and power. Deciding which you want and which are the low-hanging fruit for you is important.
First you identify the problem, then you establish an understanding of it, then you identify potential paths forward, then you make a call and put that into action. It’s an OODA loop, and a very solid problem-solving tool.
The Nature of Problem-solving
When I wrote Gendernomics Building Value , it was a response to many questions on “Now that I have this knowledge, I have no idea where to begin or what to do“, I totally understand where these guys are coming from, they are hurt, we know that since no normal men ever enter the manosphere. Every man here has suffered some damage, that they want to avoid in the future.
The problem for many of them is that they have no idea what lead to their wife leaving them, their girlfriend cheating on them, their male friends not respecting them, being everyone’s bitch at work, or all of the above.
So I decided to write Building Value as a step-by-step guide to how to productively work forward, because in the end knowledge does not generate value unless applied, but you can’t apply knowledge without understanding your situation, which requires knowledge. Seems a bit chicken-and-eggish doesn’t it?
The issue with knowledge is that while it can add a lot to your ability to problem-solve is that it can also buffer action since as long as you are gaining knowledge on a subject, it feels like you’re working on the problem. In reality many men work themselves into analysis-paralysis, or find themselves enjoying the “boys club” in this space so much they lose sight of their initial problem.
“Did you hit on any girls?”
“No, not yet but I did read 2 blogs, watch 4 hours of 2 dudes talking about red pill legos and 8 hours bitching about the election on twitter”
That’s not working on your problem, that’s like the people who post “Finally got a gym membership, 20xx is the year I get into shape” on Jan 1st, who then spend 2 – 6 weeks curling pink dumbbells in the squat rack, only to never be seen again. They get the good feelz from saying they are doing something, they do a little bit of it, then they live off that for a year or two, sinking further into the bottomless pit of Netflix.
Rian is a fan of OODA loops, “Observe, orient, decide, act”, a concept invited by military Strategist John Boyd. I like this concept and Building Value in a sense is a detailed guide to executing an OODA loop related to your sexual market value.
Meaning first you observe the situation, in order to build a comprehensive picture of it, with a maximum amount of accuracy. I.E. you have to understand your context and where you fit within it.
The second step is orient, which is all about connecting with reality through mental models, adding more mental models and improving the accuracy of your existing mental models in order to lay the foundation to make a good decision.
The third step is decide, step 1 and step 2 should have created plenty of ideas on which decisions could be made, now you decide. This is not as simple as just deciding, at this stage you have to test your decisions to spot their flaws and include issues that pop up in future observation stages.
The fourth step is simple: Act. All the steps lead to this one, your goal here is to put your decision into action and take with you what you learned from that action.
Connecting with yourself
My goal with this post is to get you thinking and being discerning about what things contribute positively to your vision for where you want to be, then start executing those OODA loops in order to move forward. The primary reason why I’ve been anti-politics and anti-culture war for the last few years is that I’ve seen too many men get involved in the grand project of owning the libs or beating the SJWs as a buffer for the things they need to do in their own life.
While I do recognize that politics and the culture war has a negative influence on masculinity in aggregate and the context within which we operate, all they are doing is making rules, and women make rules for betas. Jordan B. Peterson pointed out the problem in his metaphor of “clean your room”, that means fix the things in your own life before trying to fix the world. For most men, it’s very easy to get involved in the grand undertaking of fixing the world, it’s very hard to look at yourself with an objective lens and trying to fix that trainwreck.
To quote my King James
Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye;and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.
It’s very easy to point out what’s wrong with other people, the world and the universe, it’s even easy to hot-take in solutions or fall into the thrall of the greater organism and spend all the time you could have spent on yourself on something that seems to offer progress, admiration and accomplishments, but which is really just slacktivism.