Of Illusions and Individuality

On the tail end of my recent trip, in a blur of dates, hook-ups and matches, I found myself reading a post by Kyle Trouble [1] that gave me some pause. I especially enjoyed this reflection:

“Once you become educated in the way of women, it’s natural to become a bit jaded. Over time, this passes, as I’ve discussed—you must let go. If you don’t, you’ll just end up a miserable old hack.

But learning the true nature of how male and female dynamics works does something else. You can get the women you always lusted and desired for. You can have sex with them, and you can even keep them around in a happy and fulfilling relationship. But it all comes with a trade off. Things will be different than the fantasy world that you grew up in.” [1] 

The reason behind it is quite simple, Kyle hit on something that I’ve thought a lot about, especially in periods of my life when I run very active game. One of the habits I developed early was to keep rather comprehensive notes during these periods, not only to keep track of the different girls, but also because I think they are very valuable as a tool to help me improve my game. If something blows up in my face, I can go back and review, see where I went wrong and then take steps to avoid that happening again.

Let’s be fair, you can over-game, under-game, over-comfort, under-comfort, be too entertaining, not entertaining enough, too sexual or too non-sexual, horny instead of sexual and many other things. Most of these are dials that have to be adjusted based on the girl, the context, the culture and many other things. If one of my stories, or a sequence of my anecdotes is more effective at achieving my goal, I want to be able to put that into a pattern, to increase my efficiency.

So, I like my notes for this reason, they are my impressions shortly after the meeting, significant moments are recorded and I can go back, look at the variables, make my adjustments and improve. This makes me more efficient and gets me more results, however it also removes some of the organic, natural parts of the interaction. It’s a bit like playing Starcraft for fun vs. Starcraft as a pro gamer, sure the pro gamer is better at the game, but it’s all automated, there are few if any surprises in it. However, sometimes you get hit with a surprise.

What Kyle touched on, but didn’t make explicit was the trade-off between two sets of things, set 1 are the principles that make up Red Pill theory, hypergamy, solipsism, AF/BF, communication differences, the adventure bubble, escalation and such things. The second set are the dynamic variables that to some extent are both objective and subjective. These are shared among all girls, but the dials are set to varying levels, a good example would be the ovulatory shift, a girl who is in her proliferative phase can be escalated faster than a girl who is not. If she’s also got 3 drinks in her, has been without sex for a month, is in a foreign country and is under 25, she can be escalated even faster.

Starcraft has rules, and an optimal strategy, the Red Pill has principles and heuristics.

Continue reading

The Truth Vs. “My Truth”

When selecting research methodology for a research project, the budding researcher is often caught between two paradigms, positivism and phenomenology, both have their own strengths, and they also have their own weaknesses. The best example of the power of positivism is the census, the sample size is literally “every person in the country”, and we get data that is 100% applicable to the whole population of the country. When you employ positivism, you aim to identify objective truth, with general applicability, meaning that you need a sample large enough for your data to be applied to the general population.

The major limit of positivism though, is that it’s purely a quantitative approach, and seeks to establish things as hard facts, and to discover the causal relationship between those as hard laws. The role of the researcher within positivism is as an observer, a data collector and interpreter of quantitative data [1].

The five main principles of positivist research are summarized thus [1]:

  1. There are no differences in the logic of inquiry across sciences.

  2. The research should aim to explain and predict.

  3. Research should be empirically observable via human senses. Inductive reasoning should be used to develop statements (hypotheses) to be tested during the research process.

  4. Science is not the same as the common sense. The common sense should not be allowed to bias the research findings.

  5. Science must be value-free and it should be judged only by logic.

Interpretivism arose due to a desire among some researchers to go beyond what can be established quantitatively by positivism, and introduce a degree of interpretation into the study. For this reason it focuses more on qualitative methods and seeks to find the meaning in the data. One can break down interpretivism [2] into multiple areas, but the one must applicable to The Red Pill is Phenomenology [3]. Phenomenology as a research paradigm is focused on experiences, events and occurrences with disregard or minimum regard for the external or physical reality. It also has issues with analysis, interpretation and lower levels of validity and reliability than positivism.

See the table below for the compare and contrast: Continue reading

Reality Testing

One of the most interesting things about the seduction community and the red pill is the development of the methodologies and theory. Unlike most research projects where strictly controlled conditions and smaller samples are often used for exploratory theory, the red pill took the form of a decentralized grounded theory project. What this means in practice is that a very large group of motivated men, got together, developed theories and then field tested these theories. Over time this built a theoretical framework that outlined many of the major concepts that are now considered foundation material:

  • Alpha Fucks/Beta Bucks 
  • AWALT 
  • Hypergamy 
  • Solipsism 
  • The War-bride dynamic
  • Cocky & Funny 
  • Ovulatory shift

Field-testing thus serves a very important role within this community, in that the field reports from hundreds if not thousands of men who have attempted to implement the theory into their life both helps give confirmation, but also gives feedback on new concepts that need to be developed. For instance, the reason why Style’s “Who lies more, men or women?” opener became the most used opener back in the told PUA days was that not only did it work for Style, it also worked for thousands of other men. It worked so well, that it actually became a casualty of its own success, because it became so well known even among women, that by using it, you betrayed the fact that you were one of those “game guys“.

The more accurate a given concept in theory is, the more accepted it becomes in the greater community. The more consistently a man can produce theoretical concepts or verify theoretical concepts, the more central his work becomes to the space. Chateau Heartiste became one of the most influential blogs in this space precisely because of almost unprecedented contribution both theoretical and in terms of field reports.  For a group that has no real gatekeeping mechanism like for instance science does, this combination of contribution over time, verification of theories, and field reports are the only gate that exists.

In academia, gatekeeping takes the form of degree requirements in order to ensure familiarity with both methodology and the theoretical framework of the field. This is to ensure that people who seek to contribute are familiar with both the research that has been done within the field previously and the methodology for expanding, or challenging that knowledge. My favorite example being when John Forbes Nash, a brilliant mathematician was chided by Einstein for wanting to amend relativity without studying physics. Once one gets past that gate, peer review and replication/verification studies for a second barrier.

Researcher 1 conducts a study, that is then submitted for publication in a journal, in order to qualify for publication it must be peer-reviewed, meaning that other researchers within the field read and critique the study. Then once it has been published, other researchers within the field conduct verification/replication studies to see if they get the same results. If many replication/verification studies are conducted that confirm the findings of the original study, the original study is strengthened.

If we compare this to how it works in The Red Pill community this is similar to how things used to be: Continue reading

Tailoring Game

tailoring

Some of the most annoying questions I get are “How do I get a girl” and “How do I get that specific girl” the reason for why I hate both questions lie on the same continuum, the first one is not specific enough, is the latter is far too specific.

The reason I dislike the first one is that I could flippantly answer “$100 bucks and an online escort site“, and the reason I dislike the latter is that it views Game and The Red Pill as a Gamespot Strategy Guide for 100 completion with all achievements for the “Chicks” game. What they both have in common is a lack of understanding of what game and the red pill is, however, this is a trait that they share with many other men, women and children. This idea that the Red Pill is a book of rules with a process model that if you follow it to the T you can get any girl.

I’m sorry to tell you that the Red Pill and Game will never be a 100% guarantee to get any girl you want, or any girl at all. If you implement it correctly, make it a part of your life and do the work, it will help you get more girls, but not all girls.

The same mindset lies behind “If you were only alpha enough” or “If your frame was strong enough” or “I bang nothing but 9s and 10s and lay more pipe across North America than North American Oil & Gas Pipelines Inc.” LARPing is not that hard to spot.

Now, I started this essay with this little rant, because I want to cover an important topic today, namely tailoring. Before we get to that point of the essay, I want to define how I conceptualize the red pill and game. Continue reading

Truth and Reality

A couple of weeks ago, I sat down and I wrote a fairly long, intricate essay entitled “What is The Red Pill?“, I was somewhat puzzled that I had to do such thing but I decided to write it out, if for nothing else to make the distinctions and delineations clear in my own mind. To me it was always very clear from the Matrix quote where the metaphor comes from:

This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill – the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill – you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.

The options being, that if you elect to take the blue pill, then you wake up within your illusion, and believe whatever you want about your world. If you take the red pill, you see reality and truth. Of course, this is based on an axiom that there is such a thing as objective reality which which we can measure and interact with to determine truth. Which I tend to think is accurate, because that is the basis for much of people’s lifestyles these days, from the TRT they take to make up for their testicles not producing enough, to the scientific work that had to be done for me to be typing this on a computer, in an air-conditioned room, and being able to talk to the world. We can identify the truth defined as [1]:

The quality or state of being true.

‘he had to accept the truth of her accusation
  1. 1.1 also the truth That which is true or in accordance with fact or reality.
    ‘tell me the truth’
    ‘she found out the truth about him’
  2. 1.2 count noun A fact or belief that is accepted as true.
    ‘the emergence of scientific truths’
    ‘the fundamental truths about mankind’

However, then I got into a debate at a party with a mentor of mine, where I pointed out the distinction between facts as in the natural sciences, meaning the density of materials, the interactions of chemicals under given conditions, biological laws, and the Laws of Nature. As opposed to “facts” as in the social sciences, politics, popular vernacular and journalism, that are not so much facts, but a mixture of data and interpretations in a nice ratatouille of hodgepodge.

His response to me, as he swished some nice Cremant around in his glass, funnily enough was:

[Carl], you have to have an IQ of 125 just to understand that distinction

Continue reading

Blue Pill Alphas and BPD Girls

One of the discussions on last week’s Rule Zero that I felt I wasn’t able to complete was on self-filtering/self-selecting systems. This is a fairly simple concept that has large implications on the SMV. To illustrate the concept, any group centered around an activity has a way of filtering people within the group into a rank within the group, but also filtering people into- and out of the group. As an example, take professional bodybuilders, that population is largely composed of the people who are top 1% of people who:

  1. Started lifting early
  2. Have lifted consistently over a long period of time
  3. Have been consistent with their recovery and nutrition over time
  4. Are in the top percentages of respondents to strength training
  5. Are in the top percentages of respondents to “enhancements”

These are just a few filters but it illustrates the concept. A population centered around an endeavor will over time become dominated be an increasingly homogeneous group who shares many of the same physical, behavioral and psychological traits. Generally the selection filters work both to construct, maintain and screen for traits that permit advancement, but also to filter out negative traits. In a corporation for instance, a frequent source of issues with corporate hiring is that screening for “snakes in suits” is very difficult because psychopaths and narcissists usually have great interview skills, it’s hard to see through glibness and superficial charm during a 45 minute interview. Conversely, people with great skills for the job but poor interview skills tend to not get hired. Hence, over time a corporation gradually gets more and more dominated by the wrong people.

This is the same thing with the SMP over time it self-selects down to a point where very few good prospects exist within your age bracket as you get older. Once you hit your 50s and 60s expect women in their 50s and 60s to chase you because they have no options left, can’t go younger, don’t want to date a 70 or 80 year old man.

Continue reading

Neglecting the Mean

As long time readers will be aware, I tend to view most things in the sexual market place as conforming to the normal distribution. What this means in practice is that tens and ones are extremely scarce, fives and sixes extremely common, and the rest are somewhere in between.  I used this as an example because in this space it’s extremely common to rely on the outliers as both the examples of top and bottom.

Top, the perfect 10 trad girl who is just like your great-grandma, a symbol of femininity, grace and dignity. Bottom the crazy BPD chick with a notch count in the high 4 figures, 8 divorces, 88 false rape accusations running a hedge-fund of child support. The 400 lb dude who lives in his mom’s basement, smokes weed all day, eats nothing but hot-pockets and hasn’t been laid ever. The 19 year old billionaire with 9 girlfriends, who does nothing but jet-setting and driving lambos.

These are hyperbolic examples that draw attention away from the real, and realistic discussions we should spend more of our time on. Instead of talking about how the slightly below average guy can go from 4 to 6, we talk about reaching the apex of perfect Alpha dude. Instead of talking about how the average woman is … average, the only two positions seem to be:

A) All women are goddesses because they smell nice.

B) All women are succubi only out to tear your heart (and wallet) out through your penis.

On some level, awareness of outliers is a good thing, because once in a while, you do come across one in the wild. It could be the 0.1% of crazy, exploitative, or even huge value added, however most people are painfully average. We need to recognize that, and it needs to inform our discourse in this space to a much larger degree than it currently does.

Troy Francis said something akin to “The average guy just wants to not have to go to an office, get laid and have more control of his time. He doesn’t need to drive a lambo and bang models to improve his life.” This is not a quote, but I think my paraphrase is close enough to the sentiment. Continue reading